Symbolism 101

Most people think decluttering is just about getting rid of stuff. It isn’t. It’s about decoding the symbolism in your space, because sometimes, the wine has gone bad, and it’s time to pour it out.

A woman I’ll call “Janet” and I were in her kitchen. Janet was standing at the counter, pulling down wine bottles as we decluttered.

She pulled down a bottle and paused. She told me it was a gift from her ex. On paper, that relationship had ended two years earlier, but it was clear she still had feelings for her ex.

I suggested we open the bottle and toast to the relationship that had ended, and the new chapter she was beginning. She agreed.

As she tried to uncork it, the cork broke. When she finally dislodged it and poured a glass, she realized the wine had gone bad.

The wine had gone bad.
The relationship had gone bad.

We started laughing and then kind of groaning at how obvious the symbolism was. I joked that sometimes it feels like we’re in a Symbolism 101 class (especially when our home environment is very noisy with clutter!).

Author Joan Didion says, “Letting go is necessary throughout life. You have to. You have to because everything changes. It’s the hardest thing to learn. It’s the hardest thing to do.”

Letting go of the gift meant letting go of the promise that the relationship would start again. Janet was finally ready to let go. She poured the wine down the drain.

We can declutter all day long, but until we understand the message in the mess, nothing will truly change.

P.S. I’m happy to report that Janet has been in a long-term relationship for eight years. All the wine in her cupboard is excellent.